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Quotations and aphorism from unknown Authors

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1. "A baby sitter is a teenager acting like an adult while the adults are out acting like teenagers."

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categories: Youth and Age


2. "A BAD day's fishing still beats a GOOD day at work!"

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categories: Work and Laziness -:- Wit and Humor


3. "A bartender is just a chemist with a limited inventory."

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categories: Various


4. "A book is a present you can open again and again!"

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categories: Art and Culture


5. "A budget is just a method of worrying before you spend money, as well as afterward."

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categories: Richness and Money -:- Various


6. "A bus is a vehicle that runs twice as fast when you are after it as when you are in it."

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categories: Various


7. "A business is too big when it takes a week for gossip to go from one end of the office to the other."

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categories: Various


8. "A butterfly is a self-propelled flower."

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categories: Nature and Animals


9. "A Camel is a horse designed by a committee."

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categories: Nature and Animals -:- Various



10. "A candidate is someone who gets money from the rich and votes from the poor to protect them from each other."

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categories: Politics and Diplomacy -:- Richness and Money


11. "A candy a day gives the dentist his pay."

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categories: Health and Alcohol


12. "A cigarette is a pinch of tobacco, wrapped in paper, fire at one end, fool at the other."

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categories: Health and Alcohol


13. "A computer is almost human - except that it does not blame its mistakes on another computer."

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categories: Human -:- Science and Technology


14. "A conscience does not prevent sin. It only prevents you from enjoying it."

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categories: Joy and Sadness -:- Sin and Conscience


15. "A conservative is a politician who wants to keep what the liberals fought for a generation ago."

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categories: Politics and Diplomacy


16. "A Democrat -- too poor to be a capitalist, too rich to be a Communist."

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categories: Politics and Diplomacy


17. "A diplomat is someone who can speak without saying anything."

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categories: Oration and Silence -:- Politics and Diplomacy


18. "A diplomatic husband said to his wife: "How do you expect me to remember your birthday when you never look any older?""

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categories: Time and Passing -:- Woman and Man


19. "A face without freckles is like a sky without stars."

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categories: Youth and Age


20. "A friend is someone who dances with you in the sunlight and walks beside you in the shadows."

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categories: Friendship and Hostility


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21. "A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart, and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words."

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categories: Friendship and Hostility


22. "A good friend sees the first tear, catches the second and stops the third."

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categories: Friendship and Hostility -:- Pain and Tears


23. "A good plan today is better than a perfect plan tomorrow."

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categories: Time and Passing


24. "A happy person is one whose arithmetic is at its best when they is counting their blessings."

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categories: Happiness -:- Joy and Sadness


25. "A husband is a man who lost his liberty in pursuit of happiness."

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categories: Freedom and Servitude -:- Happiness -:- Marriage


26. "A husband is the medicine that cures all the ills of girlhood."

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categories: Marriage


27. "A laugh is a smile with a soundtrack."

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categories: Joy and Sadness -:- Optimism and Hope -:- Wit and Humor


28. "A liberal is a socialist with a wife and two children."

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categories: Family and Loneliness -:- Politics and Diplomacy


29. "A man has reached middle age when he is cautioned to slow down by his doctor instead of by the police."

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categories: Health and Alcohol -:- Youth and Age


30. "A man who thinks he is smarter than his wife, has a very smart wife!"

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categories: Intellect, Judgement -:- Marriage


31. "A person is only as big as the dream they dare to live."

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categories: Dreams and Desires



32. "A pessimist is someone who looks at the land of milk and honey and sees only calories and cholesterol."

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categories: Health and Alcohol -:- Optimism and Hope


33. "A real patriot is someone who gets a parking ticket and rejoices that the system works."

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categories: Patriotism


34. "A seafood diet is the best: whenever you see food, eat it."

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categories: Health and Alcohol


35. "A sharp tongue and a dull mind are usually found in the same head."

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categories: Various


36. "A smart husband buys his wife very fine china so she won't trust him to wash it."

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categories: Marriage -:- Trust


37. "A smile is a curve that sets things straight."

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categories: Joy and Sadness -:- Various


38. "A smile is the lighting system of the face, the cooling system of the head and the heating system of the heart."

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categories: Joy and Sadness


39. "A stand can be made against invasion of an army; no stand can be made against invasion of an idea."

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categories: Various


40. "A synonym is a word you use in place of one you can't spell."

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categories: Various


41. "A Terrorist is a man with a bomb but no aircraft to drop it from."

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categories: Peace and War -:- Various -:- Good and Evil


42. "A tree never hits an automobile except in self-defense."

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categories: Nature and Animals -:- Science and Technology



43. "A wise man sees as much as he should, not as much as he can."

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categories: Wisdom and Stupidity


44. "A wise person has something to say, a fool has to say something."

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categories: Oration and Silence -:- Wisdom and Stupidity


45. "A woman never shot a man while he was doing dishes."

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categories: Woman and Man


46. "A woman's greatest power is her vulnerability."

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categories: Power and Weakness -:- Woman and Man


47. "A 'wish' changes nothing. A 'decision' changes everything!"

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categories: Dreams and Desires -:- Various


48. "Adult: A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle."

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categories: Various -:- Youth and Age


49. "Advice is like snow -- the softer it falls, the longer it dwells upon, and the deeper in sinks into the mind."

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categories: Various


50. "After all, life is really simple; we ourselves create the circumstances that complicate it."

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categories: Life and Death -:- Question and Problem

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