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Category: Wit and Humor

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1. "In the beginning, God made the Heaven and Earth. The rest was Made in China."

Anon.

Quotations about: Various

2. "There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you."

Will Rogers

Quotations about: Authority, Government

3. "Humor has justly been regarded as the finest perfection of poetic genius."

Thomas Carlyle

Quotations about: Art and Culture -:- Talent and Genius

4. "Humor is also a way of saying something serious."

George Eliot

5. "Here`s to your coffins: May they be made of hundred-year-old oaks, which we shall plant tomorrow."

(a toast)

Quotations about: Health and Alcohol -:- Life and Death

6. "Humor is the same as truth, only faster."

Anon.

Quotations about: Truth and Falsity

7. "Humour is the describing the ludicrous as it is in itself; wit is the exposing it, by comparing or contrasting it with something else. Humour is, as it were, the growth of nature and accident; wit is the product of art and fancy."

William Hazlitt, "Lectures on the English Comic Writers"

8. "A laugh is a smile with a soundtrack."

Anon.

Quotations about: Joy and Sadness -:- Optimism and Hope

9. "A BAD day's fishing still beats a GOOD day at work!"

Anon.

Quotations about: Work and Laziness

10. "Miracles are like jokes. They relieve our tension suddenly by setting us free from the chain of cause and effect."

Gerald Branan, "Thoughts in a Dry Season: A Miscellany"

Quotations about: Dreams and Desires -:- Reality and Imagination

11. "The ability to quote is a serviceable substitute for wit."

William Somerset Maugham

12. "Imagination at wit's end spreads its sad wings."

Samuel Beckett, "Ill Seen Ill Said"

Quotations about: Reality and Imagination

13. "Advice is sometimes transmitted more successfully through a joke than through grave teaching."

Baltasar Gracian, "The Art of Worldly Wisdom"

Quotations about: Education

14. "I wish to God that you had as much pleasure in following my advice, as I have in giving it to you."

Philip Dormer Stanhope, 4th Earl Chesterfield

Quotations about: Joy and Sadness

15. "If you describe things as better than they are, you are considered to be a romantic; if you describe things as worse than they are, you will be called a realist; and if you describe things exactly as they are, you will be thought of as a satirist."

Quentin Crisp, "The Naked Civil Servant"

Quotations about: Reality and Imagination

16. "The best jokes are those that life plays on us."

Agnieszka Lisak

Quotations about: Life and Death

17. "Keep changing your life into joke, the world is not worth treating seriously."

Agnieszka Lisak

Quotations about: Life and Death

18. "Sarcasm: the last refuge of modest and chaste-souled people when the privacy of their soul is coarsely and intrusively invaded."

Fyodor Mikhailovich Dostoevsky, "Notes from Underground"

Quotations about: Various

19. "Someone who makes you laugh is a comedian. Someone who makes you think and then laugh is a humorist."

George Burns

Quotations about: Intellect, Judgement

20. "Humour is by far the most significant activity of the human brain."

Edward de Bono

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21. "Never be afraid to laugh at yourself, after all, you could be missing out on the joke of the century."

Dame Edna Everage

22. "A man with a sharp wit. Someone ought to take it away from him before he cuts himself."

Peter da Silva

23. "A fine quotation is a diamond on the finger of a man of wit, and a pebble in the hand of a fool."

Joseph Roux

Quotations about: Wisdom and Stupidity

24. "Wit is the epitaph of an emotion."

Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

25. "Good taste and humour are a contradiction in terms, like a chaste whore."

Malcolm Muggeridge

26. "Satire is a lesson, parody is a game."

Vladimir Nabokov

27. "Wit is educated insolence."

Aristotle, "The Art of Rhetoric"

Quotations about: Education

28. "Never joke at funerals, or during business transactions."

Herman Melville, "Israel Potter"

29. "France was long a despotism tempered by epigrams."

Thomas Carlyle, "History of the French Revolution"

Quotations about: Authority, Government -:- History and Nations

30. "One doesn't have a sense of humor. It has you."

Larry Gelbart

31. "A new gadget that lasts only five minutes is worth more than an immortal work that bores everyone."

Francis Picabia

Quotations about: Various

32. "A dirty joke is a sort of mental rebellion."

George Orwell, "Collected Essays"

Quotations about: Manners and Ethics

33. "Everything is changing. People are taking their comedians seriously and their politicians as jokes."

Will Rogers

Quotations about: Politics and Diplomacy

34. "Woman! The peg on which the wit hangs his jest, the preacher his text, the cynic his grouch, and the sinner his justification!"

Helen Rowland, "A Guide to Men"

Quotations about: Sin and Conscience -:- Woman and Man

35. "The wit makes fun of other persons; the satirist makes fun of the world; the humorist makes fun of himself."

James Thurber

36. "Analyzing humor is like dissecting a frog. Few people are interested and the frog dies of it."

E. B. White

37. "She had a pretty gift for quotation, which is a serviceable substitute for wit."

William Somerset Maugham

38. "As many heads as many wits."

Scottish proverb

Quotations about: Wisdom and Stupidity

39. "Life is too important to be taken as a joke, but too ridiculous to be taken seriously."

Ashleigh Brilliant

Quotations about: Life and Death

40. "Proverb - a definition ... The wisdom of many and the wit of one."

John Russell, 1st Earl Russell

Quotations about: Various -:- Wisdom and Stupidity

41. "Humor is a serious thing. I like to think of it as one of our greatest earliest natural resources, which must be preserved at all cost."

James Thurber

42. "Humor is just another defense against the universe."

Mel Brooks

43. "A comedian does funny things. A good comedian does things funny."

Buster Keaton

44. "Wit lies in recognizing the resemblance among things which differ and the difference between things which are alike."

Anne Louise Germaine de Staël-Holstein

45. "Some subjects are so serious that one can only joke about them."

Niels Bohr

Quotations about: Various

46. "Many people are surprised to hear that we have comedians in Russia, but they are there. They are dead, but they are there."

Yakov Smirnoff

47. "Humour is an affirmation of dignity, a declaration of man's superiority to all that befalls him."

Romain Gary

48. "The gods too are fond of a joke."

Aristotle

49. "Our five senses are incomplete without the sixth - a sense of humor."

Anon.

50. "Imagination was given to man to compensate him for what he isn't; and a sense of humour to console him for what he is."

Horace Walpole

Quotations about: Reality and Imagination

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