A city is a large community where people are lonesome together.
A classic is a book that doesn't have to be written again.
A clever person solves a problem. A wise person avoids it.
A closed mind is like a closed book; just a block of wood.
A comedian does funny things. A good comedian does things funny.
A committee can make a decision that is dumber than any of its members.
A committee is an animal with four back legs.
A committee is the only known form of life with a hundred bellies and no brain.
A compliment is a statement of an agreeable truth; flattery is the statement of an agreeable untruth.
A composer is a guy who goes around forcing his will on unsuspecting air molecules, often with the assistance of unsuspecting musicians.
A compromise is an agreement whereby both parties get what neither of them wanted.
A computer is almost human - except that it does not blame its mistakes on another computer.
A conference is a gathering of important people who singly can do nothing, but together can decide that nothing can be done.
A conquered nation is like a man with cancer: he can think of nothing else.
A conscience does not prevent sin. It only prevents you from enjoying it.
A conscience without God is like a court without a judge.
A consensus means that everyone agrees to say collectively what no one believes individually.
A conservative is a politician who wants to keep what the liberals fought for a generation ago.
A consistent soul believes in destiny, a capricious one in chance.
A country can be judged by the quality of its proverbs.
A Country is not a mere territory; the particular territory is only its foundation. The Country is the idea which rises upon that foundation; it is the sentiment of love, the sense of fellowship which binds together all the sons of that territory.
A coward is incapable of exhibiting love; it is the prerogative of the brave.
A critic is a man who knows the way but can't drive the car.
A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin.
A dead thing can go with the stream, but only a living thing can go against it.
A definition is the enclosing a wilderness of idea within a wall of words.
A Democrat -- too poor to be a capitalist, too rich to be a Communist.
A democratic government is the only one in which those who vote for a tax can escape the obligation to pay it.
A desert is a place without expectation.
A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.
A diplomat is a man who says you have an open mind, instead of telling you that you have a hole in the head.
A diplomat is a person who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.
A diplomat is someone who can speak without saying anything.
A diplomatic husband said to his wife: "How do you expect me to remember your birthday when you never look any older?"
A dirty joke is a sort of mental rebellion.
A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself.
A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.
A dream is just a dream. A goal is a dream with a plan and a deadline.
A drunk man's words are a sober man's thoughts.
A face without freckles is like a sky without stars.
A faith is something you die for, a doctrine is something you kill for. There is all the difference in the world.
A family is a place where principles are hammered and honed on the anvil of everyday living.
A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold.
A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject.
A farmer learns more from a bad harvest than a good one.
A fashion is nothing but an induced epidemic.
A fellow who is always declaring he's no fool usually has his suspicions.
