Erma Bombeck

"Don't confuse fame with success. Madonna is one; Helen Keller is the other."

Rating: 4.00 (Number of Voters: 3)

"There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child."

Rating: 6.00 (Number of Voters: 5)

"I'm trying very hard to understand this generation. They have adjusted the timetable for childbearing so that menopause and teaching a sixteen-year-old how to drive a car will occur in the same week."

Rating: 4.40 (Number of Voters: 5)