Resentment and anger are bad for your blood pressure and your digestion.
Six hours sleep are enough for a man, seven for a woman, and eight for a fool.
We must make the best of those ills which cannot be avoided.
A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the doctor's book.
It's no longer a question of staying healthy. It's a question of finding a sickness you like.
If the pain wanders, do not waste your time with doctors.
Health is the second blessing that we mortals are capable of: a blessing that money cannot buy.
Health is what my friends are always drinking to before they fall down.
Sickness is the first warning that we have made a wrong judgement. A healthy person is never unhappy.
Sickness is the vengeance of nature for the violation of her laws.
From the bitterness of disease man learns the sweetness of health.
He who has health has hope; and he who has hope has everything.
If you wish to keep as well as possible, the less you think about your health the better.
Eat right, exercise regularly, die anyway.
Health food makes me sick.
He that goes to bed thirsty rises healthy.
A good surgeon must have an eagle's eye, a lion's heart, and a lady's hand.
Too much of anything is bad, but too much Champagne is just right.
How do you live a long life? Take a two-mile walk every morning before breakfast.
Some people lose their health getting wealth and then lose their wealth gaining health.
Dreaming permits each and every one of us to be quietly and safely insane every night of our lives.
Never work before breakfast; if you have to work before breakfast, eat your breakfast first.
Some see the glass as half-empty, some see the glass as half-full. I see the glass as too big.
One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is terribly important.
The weakness of psychiatry is that the doctor considers himself to be healthier than the patient.
Here's to your coffins: May they be made of hundred-year-old oaks, which we shall plant tomorrow.
Acting is the expression of a neurotic impulse. It's a bum's life.... The principal benefit acting has afforded me is the money to pay for my psychoanalysis.
God invented chocolate, the devil added the calories.
The difference between medicine and poison is the dosage.
Drinking when we are not thirsty and making love at any time, madam, is all that distinguishes us from the other animals.
The heart, like the stomach, wants a varied diet.
Some people have no respect for age unless it's bottled.
Injections ... are the best thing ever invented for feeding doctors.
Never go to a doctor who's office plants have died.
Wine and cheese are ageless companions, like aspirin and aches, or June and moon, or good people and noble ventures.
I refuse to spend my life worrying about what I eat. There is no pleasure worth forgoing just for an extra three years in the geriatric ward.
Psychology - the art of turning stupidity into illness.
Money is to my social existence what health is to my body.
War is in truth a disease in which the juices that serve health and maintenance are used for the sole purpose of nourishing something foreign, something at odds with nature.
An artist has been defined as a neurotic who continually cures himeself with his art.
There are more old drunkards than old doctors.
One cup of wine is good for a woman; two are degrading; three make her wanton; four destroy her sense of shame.
A man's true character comes out when he's drunk.
A candy a day gives the dentist his pay.
No poems can please for long or live that are written by water-drinkers.
Gin-and-water is the source of all my inspiration.
I get little enjoyment out of women, more out of alcohol, most out of ideas.
If you are what you eat and you don't know what you're eating, do you know who you are?
