You can no more win a war than you can win an earthquake.
Man is the only creature that refuses to be what he is.
Skill without imagination is craftsmanship and gives us many useful objects such as wickerwork picnic baskets. Imagination without skill gives us modern art.
Manners are noises you don't make while eating soup.
The crown of literature is poetry. It is its end and aim. It is the sublimest activity of the human mind. It is the achievement of beauty and delicacy. The writer of prose can only step aside when the poet passes.
Punctuality is the soul of business.
The trouble with being a parent is that by the time you are experienced, you are unemployed.
There is no need to go to India or anywhere else to find peace. You will find that deep place of silence right in your room, your garden or even your bathtub.
Men of age object too much, consult too long, adventure too little, repent too soon, and seldom drive business home to the full period, but content themselves with a mediocrity of success.
We die of too much life.
There are only two styles of portrait painting; the serious and the smirk.
Youth is a blunder; Manhood a struggle; Old Age a regret.
Education [...] has produced a vast population able to read but unable to distinguish what is worth reading, an easy prey to sensations and cheap appeals.
Perhaps nature is our best assurance of immortality.
The cleverest of all, in my opinion, is the man who calls himself a fool at least once a month.
If my body is enslaved, still my mind is free.
The life of the wealthy is one long Sunday.
Without a knowledge of languages you feel as if you don't have a passport.
Love is the reason you were born.
America is a large, friendly dog in a very small room. Every time it wags its tail, it knocks over a chair.
Good advice is an insult that should be forgiven.
I get little enjoyment out of women, more out of alcohol, most out of ideas.
No battle plan survives contact with the enemy.
A retired husband is a wife's full time job.
Do not envy a sinner; you don't know what disaster awaits him.
Psychoanalysis is confession without absolution.
The offender never pardons.
The nice part about being a pessimist is that you are constantly being either proven right or pleasantly surprised.
Compassion is the basis of all morality.
All the works of man have their origin in creative fantasy.
Never cut what you can untie.
Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success.
Life is eternal, and love is immortal; and death is only a horizon; and a horizon is nothing save the limit of our sight.
Discretion is being able to raise your eyebrow instead of your voice.
Worry is interest paid in advance for a debt you may never owe.
Hell is other people.
Suicide is the permanent solution to a temporary problem.
A library is thought in cold storage.
If the only tool you have is a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail.
With every word unspoken each moment comes undone.
A pessimist is one who burns bridges before the enemy gets to them.
The hat is the pride of man; for he who cannot keep his hat on before kings and emperors is no free man.
The silence of a wise man is always meaningful.
Saintliness is also a temptation.
[...] parables are unnecessary for recognizing the blatant absurdity of everyday life. Reality is lesson enough.
Life is not meant to be easy, my child; but take courage: it can be delightful.
If we find a man of rare intellect, we should ask him what books he reads.
Never be afraid to laugh at yourself, after all, you could be missing out on the joke of the century.